By Teena Skiles
Have any of you mothers been involved in a conversation with your child such as this?
“I can’t, Mom.”
“Yes, you can.”
“No, I can’t.”
“Yes, you can!”
I have cut the conversation down by at least five “can’ts” and six “cans!” I have been guilty of “conning” my girls into having confidence. Are you guilty as well? Have you said things like, “OK, if you do this, then I will buy that for you,” or “OK, you can do this, and if you, do I promise I will (fill in the blank.)”
It’s “Con” vs. “Can!” This week, let’s pray that God’s true confidence will be OVER our children and IN them.
We recently went to our youngest daughter’s first softball game. She was quite upset that she actually had to play a game because, in her own words, she thought she had “Just signed up to practice.” She actually has very skilled eye-hand coordination and enjoyed practicing and working with her father and sisters in the front yard to develop her skills. But something happened when she found out that she had to perform in a game—against another team, while a crowd was watching! Something inside her told her she wasn’t good enough, made her nervous, made her want to quit BEFORE she ever set foot on the field. I know for a fact that we did not speak that into her thoughts or being. That tells me the enemy, the devil, starts out lying to children while they are young and impressionable.
That sounds exactly like the enemy I know. He will strike our children with fear and inferiority so they will never get in the game . . . the game of life! That’s where we moms come in! Go ahead, moms, give me a fist pump and a big “YES!” We have the power of prayer to establish our children in God’s true confidence, confidence that will cause them to know who they are and Who is on their side. We repeat Philippians 4:13 together every morning on the way to school: “I CAN do all things through Jesus Christ who strengthens me.” It’s not a coincidence that we say that together; we speak that ON PURPOSE!
Proverbs 14:26 says, “In the fear of the Lord is strong confidence and his children will have refuge” (NASB).
I want to raise strong, confident young ladies who will fear the Lord and will therefore be safe as His Word promises.
Holding hands and swinging our arms while walking to the dugout, my youngest daughter and I spoke the words of Philippians 4:13 again, so she could say to herself “I CAN.” We also spoke positive words like, “Today is about doing your best; today is about meeting new friends; today is about having fun; today is about trying hard; and today is about making someone smile.” By the second inning, she ran to where I was sitting, put her mouth up to my ear and whispered, “Mom, I’m not nervous anymore.” She ran back to the dugout and confidently got back in the game.
Another lesson learned . . . praise the Lord!
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
Thursday, May 6, 2010
Because I Said So?
By Beverly Hylton
How many of us have been guilty of using that simple phrase as an answer to our child’s questions as to why he or she could not go somewhere or take part in a particular activity? Many times, this is our response because our child is asking to do something that goes against what we believe to be correct. Possibly, we may have a “check” in our spirit and know that a particular activity will not benefit them or even open up an avenue for the enemy to subtly gain access.
As godly mothers, it is our responsibility to lay a firm foundation for our children. They must know “the whys” since they are based on what God’s Word has to say. Then when their faith and belief system is challenged and tested, they will know how to stand and make righteous choices on their own.
“Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God is one LORD: And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might. And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart: And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up” (Deuteronomy 6:4-7 KJV).
In today’s culture, we cannot assume that our children are going to hold to godly principles just because that is the environment in which they have been raised. This is particularly true when they enter their college years and gain some independence.
Pray that your child will develop a passion for God’s Word. As he or she gains an understanding of the Word of God, it will keep him or her grounded in our ever-changing world. In our world today, new names are being given to old sins, where wrong is being called right and where doing whatever feels good has become acceptable behavior.
So the next time, instead of saying, “Because I said so!” provide a “know-so” by giving biblical examples to illustrate how the Word of God is to be applied in everyday life situations. As the Scriptures come alive in the heart of your child, he or she will receive the Spirit’s revelation and truth imparted to their heart and mind. Pray that God will open your eyes to everyday teaching moments; when you sit in your house, walk by the way, lie down and rise up! No matter how busy you may be at that moment, stop and take the time to share and explain God’s Word to your child.
As a mother, my ultimate goal is to see my child grow in grace and knowledge and make the right decisions based upon a “knowing” that she has on her own … not just because I said so.
About the Author:
Beverly Hylton and her husband have served as the Senior Pastors of Bethel Family Worship Center in Indianapolis, IN for the past 11 years. She also currently serves as Women’s Ministries Director for the Indiana District. Beverly has been married to Russell for 19 years and they have a beautiful daughter, Kaitlyn, who is their joy.
How many of us have been guilty of using that simple phrase as an answer to our child’s questions as to why he or she could not go somewhere or take part in a particular activity? Many times, this is our response because our child is asking to do something that goes against what we believe to be correct. Possibly, we may have a “check” in our spirit and know that a particular activity will not benefit them or even open up an avenue for the enemy to subtly gain access.
As godly mothers, it is our responsibility to lay a firm foundation for our children. They must know “the whys” since they are based on what God’s Word has to say. Then when their faith and belief system is challenged and tested, they will know how to stand and make righteous choices on their own.
“Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God is one LORD: And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might. And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart: And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up” (Deuteronomy 6:4-7 KJV).
In today’s culture, we cannot assume that our children are going to hold to godly principles just because that is the environment in which they have been raised. This is particularly true when they enter their college years and gain some independence.
Pray that your child will develop a passion for God’s Word. As he or she gains an understanding of the Word of God, it will keep him or her grounded in our ever-changing world. In our world today, new names are being given to old sins, where wrong is being called right and where doing whatever feels good has become acceptable behavior.
So the next time, instead of saying, “Because I said so!” provide a “know-so” by giving biblical examples to illustrate how the Word of God is to be applied in everyday life situations. As the Scriptures come alive in the heart of your child, he or she will receive the Spirit’s revelation and truth imparted to their heart and mind. Pray that God will open your eyes to everyday teaching moments; when you sit in your house, walk by the way, lie down and rise up! No matter how busy you may be at that moment, stop and take the time to share and explain God’s Word to your child.
As a mother, my ultimate goal is to see my child grow in grace and knowledge and make the right decisions based upon a “knowing” that she has on her own … not just because I said so.
Beverly Hylton and her husband have served as the Senior Pastors of Bethel Family Worship Center in Indianapolis, IN for the past 11 years. She also currently serves as Women’s Ministries Director for the Indiana District. Beverly has been married to Russell for 19 years and they have a beautiful daughter, Kaitlyn, who is their joy.
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